Victim versus Victor

Victim versus Victor
By Tommy Franks

In our great society today, it seems that a lot of people have become victims instead of victors. We live in the greatest nation in the world; yet, we seem to have such a growing attitude of victimization. It seems as if being a victim is an acceptable way of life! Hello!

Everywhere we look, someone is saying, "I had to file bankruptcy because...If my boss would have been a better person...If only you would have done this...If my wife would have understood me better...If that crazy driver had not pulled out in front of me..." And the beat goes on...Who are we? Victims or Victors? Do we have a choice? Yes!

Many seem to be allowing outside forces to victimize them. Why? Why must we be victims of circumstances? Do we in fact control our destiny? Anytime we allow others or outside circumstances to control us, we are saying that we have no power. When this happens, we give up the right of power and control to an outside force or condition. Do we ignore our circumstances? Absolutely not! However, we must realize that our environment and state of affairs are intimately related to how we think and act. How do we get "the control" back?

First, we must acknowledge our own responsibility. We are where we are because we are in the "driver's seat" of our own vehicle and destination. No one can drive us around unless we allow them to do it...No one! The "victim complex" is when an individual refuses to take responsibilityfor his/her own life. To blame someone else or circumstances or our environment is the easy way out. The "blame game" has been around since Adam and Eve.

Question? Who is responsible for Tommy Franks? Are you? Is my family responsible? Is the State of Florida responsible? Are my forefathers? Answer: There is ONLY ONE PERSON on Planet Earth who is responsible for Tommy Franks ...and that person is none other than "Tommy Franks". This seems so simple; yet, across this great nations of ours are millions of individuals who are blaming others today for their demise and failures. Why? Because we as a free society have made it so easy for our fellow Americans to become "victims".

Not long ago I heard a TV interview with a certain prisoner who thought of himself as a victim. The interview went something like this:

Commentator: "Joe, why did you kill those three innocent people in the package store last year?"

Joe: "They got in my way. They shouldn't have been there. I didn't wantto shoot them, but they made me! I had no control over what I did!"

Commentator: "So, you consider yourself a victim of your childhood and environment?"

Joe: "Absolutely! If my parents and teachers would have understood me better, I would not be in this hellhole with all these losers! I actually wanted to be a lawyer or perhaps a judge someday...But because no one seemed to understand me, I have been incarcerated in several institutions. Some say that I am a failure. They just don’t know what I have been through!

Commentator: "Do you ever think that perhaps you are responsible for your own life?"

Joe: "Of course not...I didn't ask to be born. I didn't ask to be here. I just couldn’t help myself. Everybody knows that I have been 'dealt a bad hand'. I'm not a loser like these other clowns around here, you know!"

The above interview is tragic and should speak volumes to us! We all develop habits...thinking habits, talking habits, doing habits. Who has control of our habits? We do! Who controls our thoughts? We do! As we change our thoughts, feelings, and words, we will change our circumstances and successes (victories). We do NOT have to become victims. Yes, sometimes bad things happen to good people, but we can rise above it and continue to be victors…no exceptions!

Circumstances happen to all of us. It's how we respond to "what happens to us" that makes the difference! Normally, it is how we view a circumstance that determines its impact on our thinking and state of mind. We can move forward. We must move forward! Yesterday is forever gone! When bad things happen to us, we should acknowledge the pain, feel the loss, forgive the individual who may have contributed to our pain, forgive ourselves, release it, and move on. If we don't, the feeling of "victimization" may set in.

Looking forward, I believe that our best days are ahead of us! Our mistakes can be turned into stepping stones to a better future. Truly, our lives are being enhanced daily. We can achieve success as victors. We can achieve our dreams! The past is gone. Our future is here! Forget the path behind. Reach forward to what lies ahead. Today, let us press on toward our destiny!

Once upon a time, there was a President named Theodore Roosevelt. He was rough and tough... my type of guy. On the morning of July 1, 1898, American troops in Cuba prepared to make their assault on the Spanish forces holding San Juan Hill. Colonel Theodore Roosevelt and his Rough Riders waited impatiently for the call to action. "The instant I received the order," Roosevelt remembered, "I sprang to my horse."
That day's victory gave birth to a new historical icon: Teddy Roosevelt...his mustache, eyeglasses, and teeth-charging up San Juan Hill. President Roosevelt not only was a military leader, but also a hunter, family man, cowboy, explorer, naturalist, writer, history buff, community servant, a certified American, founder of the "Bull Moose Party", and the youngest president (42) in United States history!

Teddy was an extraordinarily successful man. He was a busy man...an organized man. Even with his "busy-ness", he still retained those human qualities that make any man successful today! For example: Teddy Roosevelt never forgot to say "Thank You" to others...even for the smallest gift or even a mere compliment. During his campaign trips via train, he always left his private car to "thank" the engineer and fireman for a safe and comfortable trip. His minutes wereextremely important to him, but people were even "more important"!

Teddy was a man of confidence, exuberance, and boundless energy. He loved people and he knew how to say "thank you", even as President of the USA. I personally think that time with people is an investment that pays huge dividends. And saying "thanks" or "thank you" to another person is just plain common courtesy or "in today's society...perhaps uncommon courtesy!" Sometimes, just doing simple little things for others will culminate in significant rewards, especially for the few seconds it takes to say "thank you". I believe that you can tell a "big man" or "classy lady" by the way he/she treats others, regardless of rank or prestige.

Bottomline: What am I saying? Take the time to say "thanks". Take the time to be responsible. Take the time to love. Take the time to be a victor. The investment will be priceless! I want to leave this poem with you today. Enjoy.

Let Us Walk In Love!
By Tommy Franks

All of us are entering a new dimension of time
Whether we believe it or not.
The love of God has been poured out upon us
From the beginning of time, especially at our conception.
We treasure His love because His love casts out fear!
We are His children
And we choose to walk in love.
Love is "never out of date".
Love endures long.
Love is patient.
Love is kind!
Love forgives.
Love is not arrogant or haughty.
Love is not self-seeking.
Sometimes, people will do us wrong.
That's inevitable, if we are still breathing!
The Secret: Continue to love!
Love will prevail.
It always has...And always will.
True Love thinks no evil.
Love believes the very best in others!
To love is not a sign of weakness, but renewed strength!
Love rejoices in justice and rightness.
Love is never cruel.
Love does not purposefully offend.
Love is filled with the fruit of peace, mercy, and joy!
Everyday, we plant seeds of love...you and I.
Our prayer is that the recipient will receive our love!
We as children of love, flow in love.
Our love for others adds dimension, character, and quality
To our passionate lives of energy.
We are secure in love.
Nothing can separate us from the Love of God.
In our love walk today, remember...
He loves us unconditionally and always!